Today's school guidance counselors have to keep abreast not only of the times, but of the future - and here's what happens when they look ahead into career possibilities in the world of yesterday's tomorrows.

Space Piracy! A wide-open field in which the sky is, in fact, not the limit. Where any able space man or woman can rise through the ranks not merely because of experience or merit, but due to his or her devious and ruthless exploitation of social interactions.

In this, space piracy is like most of the day jobs I've had.

But think of the differences! Blasting through the bulwarks of a wallowing starship, hollering like banshees, taking just a few select prisoners and leaving the rest with nothing more than some rations and a pointy stick on an out-of-the-way asteroid! Taking the largest possible equal share of the swag! Evading the pursuing ships of the Space Patrol with elan and style, except for those rare occasions in which you're hanged!

Students are encouraged to study astronavigation and hand to hand combat. Full prospectus is available.

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As often happens, this is a t-shirt design from the Retropolis Transit Authority ( [link] ). But not to be outdone, the newly established tourist board at the Retropolis Travel Bureau ( [link] ) has hijacked the design for use on mugs and customizable stickers. Yarrrr.